Reflections on my husband

Well I will not be posting over the weekend, it seems I have to go out of town. My father in law is in the hospital for some blood clots and I really need to take the kids to see him. He is not on his death bed or anything, I just need to go. For the past 2 years his health has been deteriorating. He was diagnosed with COPD in the summer of 2004. He has always been an asthmatic but it is worse now than ever. Then in the Fall of 2004 he was diagnosed with esophageal cancer. He did radiation and chemo and sometimes it was touch and go with him. So no when he gets sick we make it a poing to get the kids to see him. You never know. My dear hubby is out to sea still, this is not serious enough to bring him home. In 2000 his older sister died in a car accident and he was pulled off the boat for that during patrol. I think in the back of his mind he is waiting for it to happen again. I have really never had to deal with death, knock on wood! My husbands father is the same age as my grandparents and I just couldnt imagine them going. I mean I know one day the inevidable will happen but I dont want to accept that right now.
Also, I got an email from my husband today, it made my day a little brighter. He said he missed us, when he is out to sea he sort of gets all philosophical on us and re evauluates his role in life. That is when we mean so much to him and he expresses it. Not that we have any problems at home but I have a hard time with emotions and when he writes the way he feels about me and the kids it is easier for me rather than him tell me every day for the rest of my life. I guess it means more to hear it every once in a while rather than everyday. Is that crazy. Maybe I need some therapy. My husband is my balance in life. I am high strung and he is laid back and he knows how to handle me whereas most people do not. I think he understands me more than anyone. I guess that is why I love him too. Have a good weekend everyone