Wait its about my Weight!!!!

Well it seems that there is a common theme this week on blogger, weight loss/gain, and children. Well I am going to talk about my weight problem, I have always battled my weight. As a child my mother had to buy me Pretty Plus sized clothes from Sears, this is the equivalent of Husky sizes for girls. I have always been the overweight one in the family and I have all of these cousins who are curvy and beautiful. I really feel self conscience when around them. I mean these girls can wear anything off the store racks. I on the other hand have to shop in the womens department and no offense to my readers but in the womens department there is nothing cute and young. Well it is starting to reach out to your younger crowd. Men really have it great, weight is really not an issue unless they are morbidly obese and not able to move. Women are constantly shunned by society for being fat and/or ugly. When I was in High School, 9th grade I weighed over 200lbs. I look back and wonder why did my mother let me get to this point? Couldn't she have done something to stop me. When I was young she was slim and always exercising. But after 2 back to back pregnancies she ballooned and now those kids are 15 nd 17 and she is coming back down and looks real good. Well my 10th grade year I became interested in boys and got me a boyfriend, first mistake he told me that my hips were wider than your average girls so I started the weight loss plan from hell. I basically starved myself I was 122 pounds and my lowest I am 5'11" and looked deathly my mom threatned me with hospitalization if I did not start eating. Slowly I gained weight I think I stuck around 160 for a couple of years until baby number 1. I gained 60 pounds with this child and I think after his birth I gained 20 more, started working it off I got to 190 and married my current husband but I have constantly had to deny myself of so many things to keep my weight down. I hated eating out because I hated eating. Then came baby number 2 only gained 30 pounds with him but I ended up gaining like 30 more after he was born and here we are 3 year later and I am still trying to get the weight to come off. I am always self conscious of the way I look and I get moody when I start thinking of my weight. I joined weight watcher almost 2 years ago and I have succeeded and failed at the weight game. I have quit and rejoined many many times. Well here I am again, I have been doing the weight watchers thing again for 9 or so months and I have lost 22 pounds now. I have 30 more that I definatly want to lose just to put me under 200. Ahhh there you all know now I am a fat ass sitting on my computer all of the time. My biggest peeve is people that say, "I don't know why I am fat, I never eat." I always want to snap back and say, "Look you did not get that way just breathing." A fellow blogger is going to try and start some sort of weight loss weigh in on Tuesdays, her name is Lori. I am really looking foward to doing this with her and hopefully I will reach my goal before the Summer is out!!

My concert experience

Alright fellow bloggers I must confess, last night I went to a concert with my friend Alison!! Some of you probably have never heard of the bands but we saw, Hawthorne Heights, All American Rejects and Fall Out Boy. There were 2 other bands but I did not know their names. Each one of the 3 mentioned have had hits that are/were climbing the charts so they are fairly popular. We got tickets back in January and have been waiting for this concert, then it dawned on us, we will probably be the oldest ones there. They are not your teeny bopper bands they are like your high school punky type rock and roll. Well the time for the first act was 6:30 and this is a Tuesday night mind you. So we get there promptly at 6:30. As we pull into the parking lot we notice that there are tons of people older than us but they are escorting their children. Oh my god, we are the oldest ones that are there for the sole purpose to see the concert. So we walk with pride to the arena, decked out in our full party wear. As we are making our way to our seats, there is an older man behind us and I asked him if he brought his kids and he said yeah and that they were sitting down lower and his seat was up high in a whole different section. I would of loved to have this man as my father, take me to a concert with my friends and then sit somewhere else. Well we finally got to our seats and what the heck, the people around us have barely hit puberty, God I feel old now. There are tons of parents, I mean tons and tons. One man there had on his Pink Floyd shirt on and it looked well worn so I am figuring that was his last concert...Ha Ha. But anyway it all got me thinking, my parents never offered or even put the thought out there when I was growing up that if I wanted to go to a concert that they would escort me and my friends. I always heard how my mom went to all of these really cool concerts when I was a kid and before I was born. There were kids at this concert that were younger than my 7 year old. I guess I will just have to let him know that if he ever wants to go I am there for him, don't know if I will sit in another section or not but we will go together. The funny thing is that this row of girls behind us had to be about 14 or 15 and they knew every word to every song of every band. I do not remember having that much time on my hands at that age. But all in all we got to hear out favorites and half of the other songs we did not know and had never heard. A couple years ago Alison and I went to see Journey in concert, again some of you may know them and some may not but we were probably the youngest ones there so I wonder if someone out there blogged about us and how old it made them feel to see us at the concert?

Sending a Little Sunshine...

Hello friends,
To start the day off, I woke up late, I really despise Mondays. My son was late to school, only by 10 minutes but still he was late. He woke up on the wrong side of his bed, probably had nothing to do with me freaking out for being late this morning. Got the youngest one off to Preschool and ahhhhh......time to myself. My husband has been on leave for the past week, (Military vacation) so today was his first day back, the house was completely empty!!! I need those days to recharge for what it to come later on. Although school gets out on May 19th, that only gives me 15 school days of peace and quiet. I finally talked to my friend about not watching her daughter this summer and she was totally understanding, she is going to find a summer program of some sort for her. She had already figured on doing that before I said something. So now I feel more at peace with her. I think I was getting really standoffish with her because I had that weighing on my mind everytime I saw her.
Well I finally got around to watching Brokeback Mountain this weekend. I have been wanting to see it since it first came out. I really thought that it was good, the story line and all. The tag line for the movie was Love is a Force of Nature and I really do believe that it is weather it is a normal man woman relationship or any other kind. I saw the Movie Rent a couple of weeks ago and I was totally moved by it to, I have the soundtrack downloaded and I cant get the songs out of my head. Now I have the Chronicals of Narnia to watch, I read the stories when I was in school, of course I do not remember them now. I have not had the best luck with reading the book and seeing the movie. THe book is always better. I am currently working on DaVinci Code. I really want to see the movie but my hubby and my friend read the book so they want me to finish so we can discuss. Well I hope everyones Monday got off to a better start than mine and I hope that rest of you day is good

Family Day.......Chaos Free!!!!!

Well yesterday had to be one of the most relaxing days that I have spent with my kids in ages. I think that it has been due to my high stress level with my other situation. Well hubby and I took the kids to a state park in Florida to ride their bikes. We rode and rode and then went on a nature trail. I was really nice. My oldest son has taught himself to ride his bike with no training wheels and he flies. He has always been that way, I try to teach him something and then he ends up doing it by himself. Taught himself how to swim, to ride a bike, to tie, and to blow bubbles in chewing gum. When I first tried to teach him to ride his bike, we removed the training wheels because he wanted them off and I tried and tried with him, he doesnt have good balance so I did not see him learning anytime in the near future well he got on that bike on the same day I tried and he did it on his own. I was estatic, but yet sad because I did not get a chance to teach him. He is not the independant one, so I never foresaw him teaching himself anything. Now the other one is a totally different story, he is only 3 and he wanted his training wheels off on the same day. I did not do it, he is my child that is going to land me in the ER with broken stuff. Well yesterday they both had fun on their bikes and both held up with the distances traveled, they rode at least 2 miles total. It was really relaxing and they behaved so well that I did not want the day to end. Well we came home last night and decided to start filling our pool, its just one of those above ground ones that are like 3 feet deep and 15 feet wide. But hey when it is hot that booger serves it purpose. I see that all of my friends up north are not seeing the warm temps so I will try not to rub it in when I say I went out side this morning and its going to be a hot one!! The kids have already been in the half filled pool this morning!!! Well I hope everyone has a good Sunday

Thank God Its Friday!!!!!!

Well the end of the week has arrived, I do not know why but it seems that this was one of the longest weeks of my life. I guess since I just got home from traveling and I have been once again baby sitting. But since the week is over I guess I am now off from my babysitting duties, it ought to be interesting to see if I get paid this week or not!!! Earlier this week we took the kids fishing and the weather was really cloudy so now luck with the fish so I believe that we are going to attempt to go over the weekend. I am ready for some much needed family time, with just my family. Though with the rising gas prices we have to find stuff to do close to home. I think we are one of the cheaper places in the US to get gas and we are sitting at 2.80 a gallon for the cheap stuff. Its getting to the point that its going to cost too much to cut the grass. Speaking of grass, we also got this contraption this week it is called a yard sweeper. There is a rotating brush that flings the leaves into a trailer you pull behind the lawnmower. Makes raking a breeze, where was this contraption while the husband was at sea????

I currently have 6 screaming children in the house all under the age of 8, my son has friends over and the younger ones are getting out of hand!!! Pray for me....LOL

Just Stuff!!!!!!!!!

Today's blog requires no thinking at all it is just for your entertainment. Lately I have been rambling on and on about my problems and I need a break from them. I saw this story about this fish on MSN today and I thought I would tell you all about it. This fish is called a humuhumunukunukuapuaa, doesn't even look like a real word does it? This used to be the state fish of Hawaii and I guess they are trying to reclaim his title as the state fish again. I am thinking that maybe he lost the title because people didn't want to say that long name. My friend was stationed in Hawaii and I did not realize that they only have 12 letters in their alphabet, 5 vowels and 7 constanents!!!

As for all of you celebrity watchers out there, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes had thier baby, yesterday and so did Brooke Shields. I think it is so ironic that both of thier children were born on the same day and Tom Cruise sure did have alot to say about Brooke in that interview last summer when her book about Post Partum Depression came out. That is Karma for him I guess, although for all of you mothers out there just wait until good old Katie Holmes gets depressed and Tom cant handle her either.

Hope to have something a little more interesting for you tomorrow!!!

Hmmmmm...How should this one be handled??

Sometimes I feel like all I do is Dear Abby myself on this blog but I guess that is what it is here for. Ahhh...yet another dilemma in my life, only this one is really insignificant compared to the other problems that I have had and the other problems in the world!!! Today My friend "A" and I went to tea. You see this is the 3 year anniversary of our trip to England and we try and make it a point to find somewhere to have tea on our "anniversary" I know it is kind of goofy but it is the only thing that only she and I can do and say that we have done together in England. (Yes readers this is the same friend that I have talked about in other posts.) Well we go to the tea shop, such a quaint little place and my friend goes to park and it has moved since I was there last 5 years ago, but she knew where it was, she told me that she had parked there one day and saw the sign, then I said where is the entrance she told me where it was, I said have you been here and she told me that she and some girls from work had been in there to look around. Then I said you ate here before didnt you? And she said well yeah, I was like why couldnt you just tell me this from the get go. We got quite and you could tell that we had just entered a tense situation. I was not bothered that she had been there, what bothered me that there were basically 3 lies that led to the truth. I am hurt that she felt that she had to lie to me, why not just tell me that you had been to the freaking place before. I don't know what is going on but I really think that the friendship is losing its footing. What is it going to be built upon now, lies and deciet? If anything I am happy for her that she is getting out and doing these things and that I am not always the one that does them with her. Yes as friends you need space and I am totally understanding of that. I heard a topic on a talk show one time about guys and when they should break their friendship with another guy and the top reason was petty lying. I wonder if that should apply to women too. I really am convinced that now I am just the babysitter that she used to have a lot in common with, one day she will need me again for friendship and the only thing I can do is be here for her.

Friendship isn't a big thing - it's a million little things. ~Author Unknown

Home At Last!!!!!!

I think this trip for the last week and a couple of days has been one of the most draining things I have ever done. After the husbands graduation on Friday from Career Counselor school we jetted, 13 hours to Alabama, to visit both our immediate families. Whew...we were only there 2 nights and then we headed home arriving at 1 am this morning. I am sick and tired of the car and I do not think I have ever been so happy to come home to my own house and sleep in my own bed. Although today there is laundry to do and bills to pay. I have to get back in the groove of things. My oldest son is going to be home from school soon and I have not seen him since the Thursday before last. He has been with his biological father for Spring Break. It is so hard to share him now that we live closer to his dad. When we were stationed in Connecticut he only saw him every couple of months and now it is an every weekend thing.
Oh yeah and for all my readers I got to see my brother since he had his accident. My poor 15 year old brother stuck in a wheelchair with a broken leg and broken arm. They just did cast his arm, 10 days after the surgery, they had to wait for the stitches and staples to come out. As for his foot he is still in a boot thing and he is in it for another 6 weeks then they have to go in and remove a screw. All in all he has 2 plates in the arm, 6 screws each, 1 in the leg and 3 additional screws....for a whopping total of 21 screws, wonder if they are flat head or phillips....HA HA.
Well today is tax day and I leave you with this cute poem thing that was emailed to me by my friend in Al.

Tax his cow, tax his goat;

Tax his pants, tax his coat.

Tax his crop, tax his work;

Tax his ties, tax his shirt.

Tax his chew, tax his smoke;

Teach him taxing is no joke.

Tax his tractor, tax his mule;

Tell him, "Taxing is the rule."

Tax his oil, tax his gas;

Tax his notes, tax his cash.

Tax him good and let him know

That after taxes, he has no dough.

If he hollers, tax him more;

Tax him 'til he's good and sore.

Tax his coffin, tax his grave,

Tax the sod 'neath which he's laid.

Put these words upon his tomb:"Taxes drove him to his doom."

After he's gone, we won't relax;

We'll still collect inheritance tax.

Chaos is Calm......for now

All is calm now at the Casa de Chaos! I am over yesterdays rant and rave. I think also the fact that we are leaving here tomorrow is helping me push through, even though I wanted to get the car and go home yesterday. I was tempted!! Anyway we are leaving after his graduation tomorrow and making our way to Alabama to see family, his and mine. I was not really keen on making the 12 hr trip there and then a 6 hr trip home on Sunday but it satisfys their needs to see us for a while and the pressure to come home will be off for a while. That means that we will be busy at home for the next couple of weeks. I am putting my husband to work on some much needed jobs since he has not been home in a while.

So on to something else, I saw on the news yesterday that Brittany Spears baby fell out of his high chair. Not that I am a Brittany fan or anything. This poor girl she has had horrible luck with being a mother and it making it to the press. I really am starting to feel really bad for her, yeah I know that she has not made the best choices and such in the last couple of years but could you even imagine what it would be like to have your parenting skills constatly criticized by the tabloid and news. Just think everyone baby has fallen at sometime or another but at the time you felt horrible enough just because it happened, just imagine that and then having the local news make a mockery of you. What she does with her kid is her own thing and its not right. Just like her driving with her son on her lap a while back, yes that was uncalled for but I am guilty of taking my kids out of their seats on long trips for bottles, diaper changes, and messes. I have never driven with them I am the passenger when these occurances have happened. I think that the paparazzi has become out of hand. It is to the point where theses stars, who other than being stars are normal people, have no privacy in their lives. If I were that famous I would have to keep my children in hiding just so I didnt screw them up later in life. Like Micheal Jackson, he kept his kids faces covered in public, yeah that is a little extreme but no one knows who they are now do they.

Well it will be a couple of days until I post again, since tomorrow we are saying goodbye to this "house of Pain" I will be back in action Monday.

WARNING: I am about to vent

Ok here it is Day 5 in the hotel, heck its not even a real hotel, it is a glorified Military Barracks room. Thank God it has a private bath. Let's see, I think I have really lost my freaking mind at this point in time. I have a 3 year old who is not entertained at all by television, I can't stand sitting in a room and we have no vehicle unless I get up at 6am to take the husband to work! Ok so I am bored out of my mind. There is no playground, no pool, no anything, I can't dial out on the room phone and my cell phone is dead and the charger got smashed in the car door 2 days ago. I feel like I have joined, Survivor: Military Wife. I am sick of eating out, I am sick of riding around in the car looking for something to do. I have no adult to talk to when my husband is not around and when he is he is telling me something from his school, that I do not even understand or have the patience to learn about. Well today put the icing on the cake, he called and said I will be to the room in 40 minutes, be ready and my class is getting together at the bowling alley for a lunch thing. So I am like Ok this sounds great, let me get us ready and all so my son and I are ready and waiting, and waiting, and waiting. The 40 minutes plus 40 more goes by and here comes the husband, in such a hurry then he proceeds to tell me that everyone is not going but he still wants to go and get the lunch deal. To me it sounds like we are tagalongs and that is fine, my son is pumped up to go bowling. On our way to the car he says, "Whats wrong?" I said nothing, I am just bored. He tells me that now I know how he has felt for the past 3 weeks, I dont know what it was but it set me off. I told him, that I was here because he wanted me here and then he tells me to rent a car and go home. Instead of taking the argument any farther, I just say I am going back to the room and you take the son and go bowling. A couple weeks ago when we were talking about me coming up I said just what exactly will I do up there and he said the same thing you do at home, sit around and do nothing. Now anyone that knows me, knows I am not a sitter and a nothing doer. He just laughed and said you know I am kidding but for some reason this has just sat in the back of my mind and it has been picking away at my nerves for the last 2 weeks. I now feel like that is what I do sit around and do nothing but I would rather be doing nothing in the comfort of my own home than in some barracks room 10 hours from home.

This trip has had it good times and yet it has had it bad times, there is some tension between my husband and I. I think it is becuase I now have to wait on him for everything whereas he waited on me before. But I chased him away today and I am sitting the the room doing exactly what he says I do best NOTHING

A Unique Dining Experience

Have you ever notice how when people are on vacation they always come back and tell you about all of the good places they ate at and all of the good things they ate. I guess us as American's we love to eat!!! Well my husband and I had the ultimate dining experience last night. We ventured to this place called The Grate Steak. This was a cook your own steak restaurant. I was telling someone else about this and they said, "If you have to cook it yourself, then why even go out to eat, just stay at home." It the ambiance and experience that made it great. Well you start out by choosing the type of steak that you want and the size, then you go to the salad bar, which was excellent. Then they bring a hunk of raw steak to your table and when you are ready to cook you make your way to the grill room where you prepare your steak over live charcoal. At the grill they have things to put on your steak, like butter, season salt, pepper, garlic, montreal steak seasoning. So you basically have at it and create your own masterpiece. You can take your drinks with you and socialize with the other people cooking, so it is a total interactive dining experience. They also have baked potatoes for you to put on the grill, they are already cooked but you finish them, and then you can make your own texas toast on the grill too. The whole time you are left to do what ever you want and your waitress will come and check on you every so often to see if you need anything. Then when your steak is done, you can take your potato to the potato bar, and make your way to the table. I really enjoyed this and it was right up my husbands alley, he is an avid griller and this was just the experience for him. My son on the other hand, ate fries. That is it, he is just a pickey little thing, I guess he just doesnt know what he missed.

As for this hotel experience, there is absolutly nothing to do, we bought the son a scooter to play on since there is no playground in walking distance. I think I will take him to the track in a bit and let him ride around, and I have to do the laundry too. Hey I thought this was a vacation, but I still have to do the clothes. Thank god I have a laptop and some internet to help me keep my sanity.

Till tommorrow my friends.

A visit to Williamsburg

Well we decided to go to Williamsburg, Virginia yesterday. I have to admit I was a bit disappointed. We made it to the Williamsburg Visitor's Center, I figured we would get the information we needed and see some places of interest. The ladies at the desk we very helpful, telling us about the bus tour for $34 a person or the free walking tour. So we found out that we could walk a 1/4 mile to see one of our Nations most historic cities. So we decided that the walking tour was going to be the choice for us, it did not allow us into the exhibits but there were not so many of them and the closed at 5pm and it was already 3pm so if we did pay we would not get our moneys worth anyway. But we could walk and see the town and then there was shopping. Well we started out the door and it started to rain. So we had a jacket, an umbrella, and we bought my son a poncho. And off we were to the historic town. Muddy and wet we made it, it was really neat to think I was in a place so much history had taken place. We kept walking to the town center where all of the shops were to stay out of the rain. What is this we see, cars and parking lots. The ladies at the desk failed to tell us that we could drive into the city, and park for a nominal fee. We could have skipped the rainy walk there and back. But I always say a Memory was made on this trip, we will never forget our trek to Williamsburg in the rain and our trek back. My son did really well, never asked to be picked up once. We did get to see the drum and fife corp, that was part of the paid tour but some how we were in the right place at the right time. I hate how commercialized America's history has become. I know that they need money to help keep up the places but why so much? Well I wonder what we will do today? It is not supposed to rain but it is real cold and windy. I am thinking something indoors...

Blogging from Virginia!!!!!

Well I made it to Norfolk, Va on Thursday night and after returning the rental car and getting dinner it was basically time to head to my hubbys room and sleep. I had just driven 10 hours and I really needed out of the car. My son peed his pants in his sleep and my friends daughter threw up somewhere around North Carolina/South Carolina state line. Oh yeah, on my last hour of the trip I got a speeding ticket from a wonderful Virgina State Trooper in a beautiful unmarked car. I was going 70 in a 55. I will admit I was doing it and I was just ready to get out of the car. Well I had my friends daughter with me I had brought her up here to drop her off to her dad. This is where he is stationed at and I ended up watching her Friday morning while he had to work. But he actually asked me "How much do I owe you for watching her" Do you know how long it has been since I have heard those beautiful words?? He asked me if her mother ever compensates for me watching her too. I just said NO COMMENT and looked away. I think he got the jist of it. So yesterday I had these 2 kids in a little room and these 2 love to be outside more than anything. My oldest stayed with his biological father for the spring break week, but he is the one that would be content in the hotel room as long as there is a TV. So I told the kids after I got a shower I would take them for a walk and find a playground. After all I have no car at all, hubby took it to school today. So we leave for the walk, I ask the lady at the front desk if there is a playground anywhere nearby and she just looks at me like my head has been chopped off, of course there isn't after all this is a Navy base with 3 gyms and like 4 McDonalds but no playground. So I just figure a nature walk will have to do, or so I thought. We walked out of the doors and the heavens opened on us. Rain.....now I have to take them back to the room. TV doesn't entertain these 2 children so they ended up playing on the balcony for the next hour before the husband came back and we went to lunch. Tried to find a McDonalds with a playplace, no luck there either. After giving the girl back to her dad the day cleared up and we went to the Zoo and it was a real nice zoo, we wore our son out with walking and then we walked the mall he was ready to go to the room when we got back!!! Today we are heading to Williamsburg but there is more rain in the forecast so we will have to find something indoors!!! Wish me luck. Next week I will take the husband to work just so I have a vehicle to do something with my son. I am a woman on a mission, finding a playground!!!

Whew...I am glad that is over....Now what

Well my littlest one made it through his surgery today just fine. He had tubes put back in and his adenoids taken out, although it was like nothing at all happened to him. After the surgery they commented on how he was the most pleasant child that they ever had coming out of anesthesia. They sent us to an med/surg room for 4 hours of observation and he never cried once. He was still a little loopy from the drugs when we left. As he was getting out of the car at home and stumbling around the driveway he kept insisting that he ride his tricycle. I could not allow it for fear of an accident. Over the course of the rest of the day he never once complained of pain or discomfort, he requested potato chips and a grilled cheese and ate both. It really amazes me how resilient children are. Next it is me and a MRV for my Pseudotumor, I talked about this in earlier posts! It is a MRI with dye injected in me. Then it will be a tonsilectomy for the older one upon the end of the school year.
I am heading to Virginia on Thursday so my post will be far and few in between for a couple of days, just be patient and keep checking. I so love my readers and their comments. As for all of those that read my post yesterday about my friend and me watching her daughter, I did not watch her today or am I tomorrow. It is a much needed break and I am looking foward to it. I am still contemplating a way to tell her and a time to tell her with out any hard feelings. And I agree with Lori, if my friend gets mad then I really do not need that either. Well I hope everyone had a good day today and I will try to write tomorrow.

An Update & A Dilemma...Help Me Fellow Bloggers

Well the husband left on Sunday and due to timing constraints his "needs" were never fulfilled. I thought he was a little mad at first but I think he really realized that I just might have had a point there. We got something accomplished while he was at home, we put mulch in the front flower beds so I think I can close the book on Front Yard Beautification. It is something that I have been wanting to do for a while but with him gone he has the truck with him, and I can only carry so many bags of mulch in the back of my Focus.
Well my baby boy goes for his adenoidectomy and tubes tomorrow, I am a little nervous, the tubes are a breeze there is no pain factor there, but the other think I going to be a little painful, not like getting your tonsils removed pain but maybe worse than a sore throat pain. I am prepared with stocks of jello, popsicles, and ice cream sandwiches. I will probably gain a few pounds during his recoup time!!!! He should be back 100% by next Monday. We are going to leave on Thursday to go to Virginia to visit the hubby for the week of spring break. So see for all of you that felt bad for him, his needs will probably be attended to!!! I am taking my friends 4 year old daughter with me, her father is stationed in VA so since I am going to be in the area I volunteered to take her with me to save her a trip. My best friend and her daughter moved down here, almost 6 months ago, upon her leaving her husband of 5 years, my husband and I took them in until she found a place to live and a job. They were with us from the end of Oct to the beginning of January. The have moved to their own place now. We knew them from being stationed in Connecticut, she, Mimi, and I all lived in the same building along with some other families. Well anyway so our family went from 4 to 6 overnight and it wore thin quick on my husband but I promised to be here for her for anything that she needed. I think of her like a sister, and boy oh boy do we fight like siblings too. I have now watched her daughter for almost 6 months everyday after Pre-K. I pick her up, take care of her and feed her dinner from time to time. Much I feel goes unappreciated, although I would love to feel a little more appreciated then I am, in the end it really is not worth it to me. I also get paid on occasion to do this for her, now here is the dilemma I am having. I do n0t want to spend all summer watching her, I do not mind doing it a couple of days a week but I will be going from 3 hours a day to 8 hours a day and I think that is going to become a little wearing on my family. Plus my husband is the type that just likes to pick up and go do something out of the blue and with someone elses kid everyday we will not have that freedom. I just do not know how to go about telling her this, as I know it will probably cause alot of friction between us. Plus I feel that by me watching her all of the time, my friendship with her mother has slowly deteriorated into a friendship merely of convienence. I am just always available when she needs me and I feel really guilty on the afternoon when I say put her in after Pre K care because I have things I have to tend to. But then the realization came to me that when I need child care I have to pay for it and sometimes it is really hard for me to find. I have talked to people about this and they all tell me I need to talk to her about it and that it has gone on far too long something needs to be done and done soon before I am not a friend anymore. But how do you go about telling someone that you can not watch their child, especially when that person is your bestfriend. You think that you would be able to tell your best friend anything without her getting mad at you or you getting mad at her. Our friendship is truly explosive but I love her still!

But friendship is precious, not only in the shade, but in the sunshine of life, and thanks to a benevolent arrangement the greater part of life is sunshine. ~Thomas Jefferson

Husband is home for a visit & other things

Well my hubby has come home from school this weekend just to visit us. My 3 year old goes for surgery on Tuesday and I think that he wanted to see him before the surgery. (he is getting the adenoids removed and tubes put back in) Well the hubby gets home at 10 pm last night, the kids have waited up to see him and such and I am happy that he is home but I have a whole lot on my mind (I will go into detail on that later). Well now he is mad at me because the first thing I did NOT want was sex when he came home. Sure it has been 12 days since I saw him last but there are more important things than just that. I want to see him to spend time with him, but yet it pisses me off that I do not think that he thinks the same way. Why does it have to be sex first and time later? I guess because he is male. So I laid in bed and talked to him, something that we have not been able to do to much of the last 2 weeks. Sure I have talked to him on the phone, but I have not talked to him a whole lot because I hate the phone. UGH!!!! MEN.....Can't live with 'em, can live without 'em.
Well on to the subject that was clouding my mind yesterday, my mom called and they were rushing my 15 year old brother to the hospital for a prossibly broken leg and arm. He jumped off the bleachers at school and fell and I guess landed really wrong. I finally got a hold of my mom and she told me that he had broken his ankle and his arm and that they were prepping him for surgery. He ended up with pins and plates in his arm and leg. He is going to be in a wheelchair for the next 8 weeks. But my moral dilemma was my husband was on his way home and I really felt I needed to make the trip to Alabama to be there for my family, as you see nothing this serious has ever happened to any of them. But I stayed here since I realized that there was nothing I could do for them other than take my kids and get in the way, and the boys seeing their father was far more important.

For every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness. ~Author Unknown